Grief, Hope, and Music
I knew I was in trouble as soon as the short drum intro to "Changing Colours" by the Great Lake Swimmers started playing through the car stereo. It was August 2022, and I had just been to see my grandmother for what turned out to be the last time. I had held her hand and tearfully talked to her for over an hour. She was not conscious and I was unsure whether she could hear me, but hopeful that she felt the love and reverence in my touch. She was surrounded by love, with her children and grandchildren holding a rotating vigil by her bedside. She died peacefully that night. As I left early that afternoon, I did my best to pull myself together as I got into the minivan to pick up my twin daughters. As usual, I put my phone music player on shuffle. A couple of blocks away from their school, "Changing Colours" came on. I didn't stand a chance. The tears started before the end of the first verse. That song had spoken to something deep in my heart since I first heard i